I’m not a “Natural kind of Mum”

One of my friends has a baby that is tiny for her age and a suggestion was made to her that she give her baby growth hormones. This baby is her 4th, and she is fully breastfed and meeting milestones perfectly. This Mum was very quick to say “No thanks” to that suggestion.

I was telling another person about how silly it was that someone would even suggest a healthy baby needing growth hormones and they said “she’s a natural mother, she wouldn’t bother with that stuff”.

So it got me thinking.. I’m not really a “natural” mother, but nature would wildly disagree with that because I grew my baby inside me like any other mother did.

So from the very beginning I did everything “unnaturally”. I had a cesarean section. Baby and I were separated at birth for the first few days and baby struggled to latch. He went straight to formula and bottles. He uses a dummy. He doesn’t sleep in my bed, or even my room. I don’t wear him around. He sleeps in his big cot in his own room with his dummy and his swaddle. His routine suits me, it benefits both of us. If I want to change it to suit my plans for the day, I do.

So then I speak to other mothers. I feel that their children are the absolute centre of their universe, and they maybe infer that perhaps mine isn’t. They wear their babies around and pop their boobs out confidently and feed all the time and say sh** like “oh yeah I know nothing about that sterilising stuff” cos they don’t. Why would they need to know about keeping bottles clean and measuring out formula when their body completes their child’s every need.

I have some organic clothes, sure. But my baby sorta just wears what I think is cute. I reduce, reuse, refill and recycle wherever possible but also like to put my nappies in plastic bags so they don’t ruin people’s lives with their smell in the summer heat until the bins get emptied.

I feel like an A** cos other mums are just so “natural”.I had all of those intentions for my child until his birth, and then I had to survive, and so did he. We just had to make it all work somehow. I copped so much flack for not breastfeeding, for not sleeping him in my room, for starting solids at 4 months instead of 6.

And I’m over it.

I’m a natural mother just as much as anyone else. Sure I clip his dummy to him and not me. Sure, I push him around in a pram and don’t wrap him onto my skin so that our hearts are constantly in sync. He’s too big, I’m too small, and it’s too damn hot for that s***. Good on any mother that just completely gives herself to her child. I’m all his, but I’ve gotta be comfortable otherwise I’m useless.

But you know what? I know his cues, I understand his communication, I know what he needs and when. He refers to me when he is tired or hungry. He’s a happy baby, he sleeps when he’s tired and he eats when he’s hungry. I meet and exceed his both physically and emotionally, and I do it every single day.

And that makes me 100%, salt of the earth, Mother Nature endorsed, natural.

E.

4 thoughts on “I’m not a “Natural kind of Mum”

  1. Elicia you are a great mother the proof is in Teddy a happy healthy little baby, being a mother is the hardest job of all, don’t worry about what people think or say what ever works for you and Teddy is all that matters, we love you xx

    Liked by 1 person

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